On September 10, let us get together and light a candle in our windows, and let the flame of life live on. If you have lost someone to this terrible act of desperation, let the sparkle offer guidance to him or her; if you are a survivor of a suicidal act, then let this light become your motivating emblem. According to statistics, around the world, more then 1 million people end their life too soon. These are sadly, what statistics are saying, but it is high time we learn another word as well: prevention.

Start paying more attention and affection to those near you. Start getting involved in health and governmental programs that offer help to those in need, to those with suicidal thoughts or acts. Do not respond passively, but start becoming actively involved today, by supporting IASP (International Association for the Study of Pain) in its activities. Walks to remember, candle lighting, placing suggestive banners on your own website, attending conferences, get-togethers, are only a few of these activities that bring people closer and will raise awareness on the importance of life. It merely costs you a few minutes of your free time to become actively involved, and you might save a life.

Think about it this way!

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For both the ones that believe and don’t believe suicide is very hurtful to everyone and leaves a lot of people in pain. When you have committed suicide because you are tired of the way things are, or you just don’t have any more hope you have no idea what good might have happened in your future if you would have waited and had faith that things would change and turn around. It might sometimes take years, or just a few days before something positive happens but when you believe and trust in God just remember that all things are possible for those that love and serve him. If you don’t believe in him then give him a chance and let him wrap his arms around you. Things might not change over night but when you trust in God your heart starts to change and you know that you can make it plus that there is hope out there for you.

Lets say that someone is walking down the street and gets hit by a bus, you might have been close by and could have saved that person from death. What if a child falls down and is unable to get up but need someone else’s help there and no one else is there because you committed suicide? You never know what is ahead and who might have needed your help but didn’t get it because you took your life away before time. You might be surprised at how many people it can hurt and not only now but in the future. In order to move forward you have to let go of the past and learn to forgive yourself plus others. Once you have let go then you will be able to move on and your life can become a beacon of light that the world needs. It is very easy to feel down and depressed when you are alone, or if someone just died in your family but there is hope out there and you are never alone because Jesus cares for you and he is there waiting for you.

If you are saved and going through a hard time turn everything over to Jesus. Everyone is tested and each one of us has a different story to tell but when we lean on him he can help us. This might have happened to increase your faith, or maybe what is happening might help someone else later when they are going through the same thing. Reach out and put your faith and trust in Jesus because he has not forsaken you, and he loves you. Jesus did not come to kill, steal, and destroy. He came to give life and if you take it away you are missing out on all of the miracles and blessings that is to come. When you feel that there is no hope, or that nothing is working out just kneel down and ask Jesus for help, ask him to forgive you of your sins and talk with him as if he is there in the room with you. Don’t hold back the tears and emotions just let it all go and stand up renewed, refreshed, and remember that “All things are possible for those that fully believe in Jesus” Mark 9:23.

P.S. This article was sent to us by one of our readers. Feel free to send your own articles, you never know who you might help. Contact us here.

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My father committed suicide with an overdose of prescription medicine taken in conjunction with alcohol. Alcohol is a depressant that exacerbates suicidal tendencies in those who are prone to such self-destructive acts. I was 16 years old at the time. I was wrongly ashamed of my father’s suicide for most of my life. In fact, that feeling of shame is one of the great regrets of my life. With the combination of drugs and alcohol my dad might not have even intended to take his life. It could have been an accident. Their was no suicide note. He had no previous declaration of intent to commit suicide. The answer to that mystery we will never know. Still, officially his death certificate declared it a suicide.

If someone asked how my father died, I would say that he died of a heart attack. That is the response my mother repeatedly instructed me to say. The manner in which my father died was not about him in her mind. Rather, it was about us. My mother was concerned about what others would think of us if they knew my dad had committed suicide. Perhaps, she thought, they would blame us. They might suggest that we drove him to it. They might suggest that we failed to appropriately respond to his suicidal tendencies. In short, my mother worried that they might blame us for my father’s suicide.

Thoughts of if only we had done or said this or that constantly crept in to our minds. It was an emotionally destructive self-imposed guilt trip. Guilt can cripple. When guilt is unjustified it is especially damaging.

The Christian approach to guilt, real and imagined, is in recognition and confession of sin, and faith in the love, goodness, and power of God — “casting one’s cares upon him,” not — in no way– upon the probability of one’s own, or the suicide’s, lack of, or diminished-under-the-circumstances (mental illness), guilt. To cope with suicide one must dump their guilt. It doesn’t belong in the grieving process. Grief is plenty enough to cope with without the burden of unnecessary and undeserved guilt.

Even in cases where no guilt is present the conscience will find occasion for and evidence to accuse. It’s a struggle I call the blame game. The blame game is a method of coping by blaming someone else for the suicidal death that torments you. Sometimes you blame another relative. Sometimes you blame the person who committed the suicide. Often it’s a combination thereof. This venting of anger on someone else tends to provide some measure of relief in the short term. It doesn’t work in the long term. Blaming anyone for suicide is wrong most of the time. Where mental illness is the culprit, nobody and nothing except the mental illness itself is to blame. The sooner people come to terms with this truth the sooner they’ll be on the path to recovery.

Most people are ignorant about suicide. That is why they often shy away from family members or friends who are struggling with suicide. It is wrong to be ashamed of or by the suicidal death of a family member or friend. It is cruel to desert those who are suffering. Feeling uncomfortable with suicide is never an excuse for rejecting those who struggle with this most tragic of deaths. Ask yourself, would you desert them if the person died of a heart attack or cancer? How can you desert them if their loved one died from suicidal mental illness?

Mental illness can kill just like cancer and heart disease. In suicide, most often it is the mental illness that kills, not the person. A mentally stable person does not react to angry words or events by killing themselves. Only mentally and emotionally sick people do that. That is why their response to anger or any other stimuli is irrational and illogical. If they were healthy it is unlikely their response would be suicide.

Depression affects your mental and emotional state of mind but it has a biological origin. Depression can be triggered by anger and resentment which have physiological effects. While the anger can elicit an emotional response, it is the biological mental illness (depression) that is the culprit. People get angry everyday but they don’t kill themselves because they are mentally healthy. Hence, you ought not blame or exculpate the person who committed suicide. This brings us to the mercy of God. He knows all, He is just and He is merciful. Take comfort in Gods mercy. Also take comfort in understanding that with few exceptions suicide is faultless and blameless.

Some 20 years after my fathers death I had to cope with multiple suicide attempts by my brother. It was scary and emotionally draining. My brother is still living – thank God. However, he had a lot of close calls. More than once death was knocking at his door. The family was notified to get to the hospital quickly. Doctors doubted my brother would survive his latest suicide attempt. After every
attempt he would be grateful for his life. He would also feel incredible guilt for the fear and heartache his suicide attempts brought on his family. Then he would get depressed and regress. Eventfully, like a vicious cycle, he’d attempt it again and again.

My brother is a Viet Nam veteran. Like so many vets who endured that conflict, he suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). He is designated as a service connected 100% disabled veteran. Depression is a consequence of PTSD. Fortunately my brother came to terms with his mental illness and sought treatment. I have no doubt that treatment, medication, and prayer are what saved his life. It has allowed him to live a mostly productive life although he still struggles with his illness. Treatment, medication, and prayer are the difference between my brother and our father. Our dad had none of these and, of course, he died.

A little over 20 years after my father’s death I had to deal with the suicidal death of the 14-year-old son of very close and dear friends. It was shocking and traumatic. Losing ones child unexpectedly is about the worst heartache one can ever endure. To lose that child as a result of suicide is far worse; it is indeed grief to the extreme.

There were warning signs, but they were not apparent to his parents. He experienced slight personality and behavioral changes that were more observable at school and with his friends, especially his girlfriend, then at home. That’s why it’s important to communicate in the family setting. Depression is often difficult to see if you are not looking for it. School officials and friends either didn’t know the warning signs or they disregarded them. Families can’t rely on others to inform them.

Symptoms of depression or suicidal feelings may include a change in eating or sleeping habits, withdrawal from friends and family, giving away valued possessions, rebellious behavior, running away, drug and alcohol abuse, unexplained obsessions, decline in the quality of work or school work, and marked personality changes. It is important that parents, teachers, counselors, and pastors know and recognize these signs. It could save someone’s life.

Everything seemed normal that evening. Nothing seemed different or peculiar. It was a pleasant evening until his mother heard the gun shot that would be the beginning of grief on a huge scale. This would be compounded by the prevalent why questions. It would be accompanied by the expected guilt and blame which his family didn’t deserve to feel. It wasn’t their fault. Nor was it his fault. His mental illness killed him as surely as cancer takes its victims if left untreated. But a parent can’t seek treatment or medication for their child unless they know that the child is sick.

It was difficult to go through this ordeal with them. I genuinely felt their pain and shared their grief. Still, it was important to be there for them. It cemented our friendship and even took it to a new level. That is something to remember if you know someone who is trying to survive suicide. Be there for them. It’s the right thing to do. It’s the Christian thing to do. Don’t just offer help and wait for a call that never comes. Insist on sharing their grief. If nothing else be there to sit with them, hold them, listen to them, or just silently occupy space with them. They will gain a measure of comfort just from your presence. They will know you are genuinely there for them if the grief becomes too much for them to bear alone.

Our most recent loss was the suicidal death of my niece. This was especially difficult to cope with. My mother is not very stable and I already explained my brother’s history. This was his daughter, his first-born. Worrying about how grief would impact them while dealing with my own grief was a monumental emotional undertaking. It took the saying be strong for them to a new level.

I watched my niece grow up in to a gem of a woman. She was as pure as the driven snow. She was devout in her Christian faith. She was a registered nurse who took pride in providing for the health care of others. She served her country honorably as a commissioned officer in the US Air Force. She was only in her early thirties but she was very sick. She was mentally ill.

My niece was bipolar. She had the most severe form of obsessive-compulsive disorder that her psychiatrists had ever seen. She also suffered from schizophrenic episodes and severe clinical depression. As an RN she understood her condition. She wanted to live but she didn’t know how to with so much mental anguish. Nobody could help her. No medications sufficed. As a woman of faith she struggled desperately and prayed continuously, on her knees, for hours at a time.

She had several suicide attempts that failed. It was destined that she would succeed at some point. When people are that sick they are unable to reason. They can’t think clearly or rationalize effectively. All they do is suffer. It’s not surprising that they are focused on placing an end to that suffering. Mental illness can be very deadly.

It’s important to understand that healthy people do not kill themselves. A person who is depressed does not think like a typical person who feels good. They live in the here and now. Depression keeps them from looking forward to a better time. They can’t comprehend positive thinking. Sometimes they don’t even realize they are sick much like my dad and our friend’s son. Sometimes they are very much aware of their mental illness like my brother and my niece. They seek help and struggle as best they can but sometimes nothing works for them. Not medication, not therapy; absolutely nothing helps them. These are the most severely afflicted with suicidal mental illness. My niece was one of these. They will continue to attempt suicide until they succeed. You cannot help them. You cannot save them. All you can do is pray for them.

It is disturbing when some so called experts say that suicide is preventable. It suggests that everyone who ever committed suicide could have been saved. While it is true that suicide is often preventable it is like wise true that sometimes it is not. Suggesting otherwise can lead to endless suffering and needless guilt by suicide survivors. The reality is that in sever cases of metal illness nothing short of divine intervention can save a suicidal person.

Remember, nobody who commits suicide asked for their depression. They would do anything to rid themselves of it. Being depressed isn’t the result of life choices any more than catching a cold is. Some people get it, and some don’t. Such is life.

It is hard to imagine suicide being a sin in these clinically depressed people. One cannot offend God by involuntarily contracting an illness, regardless of what the illness may be. If suicide in such a circumstance constituted sin, then it would be sinful to catch the flu or die of pneumonia. It is comforting to know that most mainstream religions understand and share this viewpoint, especially Christian denominations. The Catholic church of my faith was once notorious about guilt associated with suicide. It taught that the commission of suicide was a mortal sin. This explains why my mother is still living a lie about her husband’s death. However, the Catholic Church has since clarified their position on the issue of suicide. The Catechism of the Catholic Church plainly states, “We should not despair of the eternal salvation of persons who take their own lives…” (2282 – 83).

This does not mean that suicide is never sinful. If someone is of sound mind and premeditatedly acts to kill himself/herself for the purpose of punishing or harming another, that would be a sin. If they avoid deserved punishment by the state for a criminal conviction by committing suicide that is arguably a sin. Anyone who commits a suicidal act with malice aforethought for evil purposes is at grave risk of mortal sin. That is tantamount to murder, which is a crystal clear violation of Gods commandment: “Thou shall not kill.”

If a person, because of mental illness, sincerely believes with their heart and soul that dying will somehow end the suffering and anguish of others, regardless of how wrong they may be, who could doubt that it is nonetheless a selfless act in the eyes of God. Remember, “No greater love has a man than to give his life for another.”

Some people who commit suicide exhibit enormous courage in the undertaking. Consider the soldier who deliberately throws himself on a hand grenade or a land mine to save the lives of his comrades. Did he knowingly kill himself (i.e., commit suicide)? Yes, of course he did. Was it also a courageous and self-less act of courage? Absolutely! It was courageous and selfless. We correctly label this soldier a hero. People who commit suicide are not cowards as some suggest. Jesus serves as a perfect example of one who suffered immensely and sacrificed his very life for the salvation of others. Sometimes we do need reminding.

Depression is usually a treatable disease. Most people who are depressed do not commit suicide or even attempt it. But they are more vulnerable to the risk of suicidal thoughts and they and their family members should be aware of this. Most people, who suffer from mental illness, unless it is extreme, will benefit from therapy, medication, or a combination of these. In the case of depression medication very often can permit these people to live completely normal and happy lives. The key is first to recognize the problem and then obtain treatment as soon as possible.

Some people are more prone to suicide than others. They should be particularly alert to the warning signs of depression. Suicide tends to run in families. My family is living proof of this. Suicide most often results from brain disorders such as clinical depression, anxiety disorders, bipolar illness, schizophrenia, and severe obsessive-compulsive disorder. All of these brain disorders have a genetic component that, if left untreated or mistreated, can result in suicide. The risks of suicide increase considerably the longer a person goes without treatment. That is why it is dangerous for a depressed person to avoid treatment for fear that he or she might be labeled as being crazy. We are living in modern times. We are way beyond such foolishness; at least we ought to be.

If you suffer from depression don’t take a chance – get help. If your child is depressed, get your child help and do it quickly. Do this even in the face of resistance. You just might be saving their lives.

It is estimated that mental illness is the cause of 95% of all suicides. The #1 cause of suicide is untreated depression. Ninety-five percent of all suicides are the direct result of the aforementioned brain disorders. According to the National Mental Health Association the teen suicide rate has risen an astonishing 200% in the last 40 years. That is a rate three times what it was in 1960. Suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death for 15 – 24 year-olds. About five thousand 15 – 24 year-olds kill themselves every year. These are alarming figures.

In conclusion, it is important to point out that maintaining your faith will increase your rate of recover from the tragedy of suicide. Don’t pray less. Instead pray more. Your faith will be your greatest source of comfort. Don’t be mad at God. God did not betray you by letting your loved one die. He understands the pain of death. He endured it with the sacrificial death of his only begotten son for your sake and everyone else’s. Jesus understands the pain of death. Remember how He wept for Lazarus. Remember how He suffered in His own blameless death. Remember how His blessed mother Mary suffered when He died. Remember the painful deaths of His Apostles.

Remember, everyone dies of something; it’s preordained. We cannot escape death, at least not in this worldly life. Your loved one just happened to die of mental illness that resulted in suicide. Even in this worldly death we still remain spiritually linked. You have not lost your loved ones. You have merely postponed being in their company until such time as God calls you home. He will do that plenty soon enough so don’t try to rush the process. Remember it’s about His will, not yours.

If ever you have to endure being a suicide survivor take comfort in knowing that you can survive even though the anguish of your loss may at first seem to be insurmountable. Everyone must go through a grieving process when a loved one dies. The grief associated with the suicidal death of a loved one is manifestly more difficult to cope with than other types of death. But, it is also similar in that it will likewise end. You don’t necessarily get over your loss; that void is always there. However, you do learn to cope and deal with it. Your pain will go away. You will come to understand that your loved one remains with you in spirit and you with him or her. You will laugh again. You will experience love and
joy. You will obtain peace of mind even though you’ll always have the sorrow associated with loss. But we feel sorry when we lose our youth and vitality too. That doesn’t mean that we stay miserable because of it.

Definitely grieve, but also let go. Get professional, spiritual, or other help if you need it. Accept the fate that you are dealt just as Jesus and his blessed mother accepted the fate of the Holy sacrifice at Calvary. Jesus, while suffering the pains of crucifixion asked of his heavenly father, “Why hast thou forsaken me.” Even the Son of man asked why. He also said “Thy will be done.” Our Lord in faith accepted his fate and in so doing taught us to do the same. We don’t have to know and understand everything. In faith we must just believe, as Jesus did, that God understands and knows what is best. He will take care of things, perfectly. Accept, as Jesus did, the fate you are dealt no matter how much it hurts at the time. After all, you can’t change it and you are not responsible for it.

Understand the difference between holding on to a memory and clinging to a soul. Release the soul from your mind so that your loved one can be with our Lord where he or she will prepare a place for you when your time comes. You will be together again and the next time it will be for all eternity. That will be a joyful eternity with God almighty. Trust in God and maintain your faith. God will make it right. You will survive.

Copyright: Ed Coet

Ed Coet is a retired US Army officer, a professional educator, and a widely published freelance writer and poet. Ed has had numerous articles published on a variety of topics. Ed’s short stories, David’s Angel, Big Bertha, and Simon and Papa John were published in the popular Ezine Bewildering Stories and in Author’s Den.com. Big Bertha was also published in Scribal Tales magazine. Ed Coet’s poems have been published in Purple Dream Ezine, Solder Works magazine, Children, Churches & Daddies magazine, Scars publication, Steller Showcase Journal, Both Sides Now Journal, Because We Write magazine, Lost Beat Poetry Journal, Cynic magazine, Fullosia Press, Blue Fog Poetry Journal, Author’s Den Ezine, The Huffington Post, Raven Publishing, Inc., Muscadine Lines, A Southern Journal, and Namaste Fiji – The International Anthology of Poetry.

Visit with Ed Coet at “The Coet Blog” at http://thecoet.blogspot.com/.
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INTRODUCTION

Suicide is one of the commonest causes of death among young people. The latest mean worldwide annual rates of suicide per 100,000 are 0.5 for females and 0.9 for males among 5-14-year-olds, and 12.0 for females and 14.2 for males among 15-24-year-olds. Suicide is the sixth leading cause of death among children aged 5-14 years, and the third leading cause of death among all those 15-24 years old. In most countries, males outnumber females in youth suicide statistics. There are far more suicidal attempts and gestures than actual completed suicides. One epidemiological study estimated that there were 23 suicidal gestures and attempts for every completed suicide. Though female teens are much more likely to attempt suicide than males, male teens are more likely to actually kill themselves. The suicide rate among young teens and young adults has increased by more than 300% in the last three decades.

RISK FACTORS FOR SUICIDE

Contrary to popular belief, suicide is not an impulsive act but the result of a three-step process: a previous history of problems is compounded by problems associated with adolescence; finally, a precipitating event, often a death or the end of a meaningful relationship, triggers the suicide. The major, empirically proven risk actors for suicide among adolescents are detailed below.

PERSONAL CHARACTERISTICS

Psychopathology:

More than 90% of youth suicides and around 60% of younger adolescent suicide victims have had at least one major psychiatric disorder. The most prevalent disorder in adolescent suicide victims is depressive disorders. Depression that seems to quickly disappear for no apparent reason is a cause for concern, and the early stages of recovery from depression can be a high risk period. Substance abuse, conduct disorder, posttraumatic stress disorder and panic attacks are the other disorders found to be common in this population.

Previous suicide attempts:

A history of prior suicide attempts is one of the strongest predictors of completed suicide, especially in boys. One quarter to one third of teen suicide victims have made a previous suicide attempt.

Cognitive and personality factors:

Hopelessness, poor interpersonal problem solving ability and aggressive impulsive behaviour have been linked with suicidality.

Biological factors:

Some teens are at greater risk for suicide because of their biochemical makeup. Abnormalities in the function of serotonin, a neurotransmitter, have been associated with suicidal behaviour.

FAMILY CHARACTERISTICS

Family history of suicidal behaviour:

Teens who kill themselves have often had a close family member who attempted or committed suicide.

Parental psychopathology:

High rates of parental psychopathology, particularly depression and substance abuse, have been found to be associated with completed suicide and suicidal ideation and attempts in adolescents. Moreover, family cohesion has been reported to be a protective factor for suicidal behaviour among adolescents.

ADVERSE LIFE CIRCUMSTANCES

Stressful life events:

Life stressors such as interpersonal losses and legal or disciplinary problems are associated with completed suicide and suicide attempts in adolescents. The anniversary of a loss can also evoke a powerful desire to commit suicide.

Physical abuse:

Childhood physical abuse has been found to be associated with increased risk of suicide attempts in late adolescence and early adulthood.

SOCIOECONOMIC AND CONTEXTUAL FACTORS

School and work problems:

Difficulties in school, neither working nor being in school, dropping out of high school and not attending college pose significant risks for completed suicide.

Contagion/Imitation:

Teens are more likely to kill themselves if they have recently read, seen, or heard about other suicide attempts. Evidence continues to amass from studies of suicide clusters and the impact of the media, supporting the existence of suicide contagion. The impact of suicide stories on subsequent competed suicides appears to be greatest for teenagers.

PREVENTION STRATEGIES

Youth suicide prevention strategies have primarily been implemented within three domains – school, community, and health are systems. This article reviews the school-based programs.

SCHOOL-BASED SUICIDE PREVENTION PROGRAMS

School based suicide prevention programs include both curricula components to teach students about these warning signs and what to do, as well as non-curricula components such as peer groups, hot lines, intervention services and parent training. Prevention includes education efforts to alert students and the community to the problem of teen suicidal behavior. Intervention with a suicidal student is aimed at protecting and helping the student who is currently in distress. Postvention occurs after there has been a suicide in the school community. It attempts to help those affected by the recent suicide. In all cases it is a good idea to have a clear plan in place in advance. It should involve staff members and administration. There should be clear protocols and clear lines of communication. Careful planning can make interventions more organized, and effective.

The goals of school based suicide prevention programs are to:

* Increase awareness

* Promote identification of students at high risk of suicide and suicide attempts

* Provide knowledge about the behavioral characteristics (“warning signs”) of teens at risk for suicide.

* Provide information to students, teachers and parents on the availability of mental health resources

* Enhance the coping abilities of teenagers

Education:

Education may be done in a health class, by the school counselor or outside speakers. Education should address the factors that make individuals more vulnerable to suicidal thoughts. Education regarding the ill effects of drug and alcohol abuse would be useful. PTA meetings can be used to educate parents about depression and suicidal behavior. Parents should be educated about the risk of unsecured firearms in the home. Outside mental health professionals can discuss their programs so that students can see that these individuals are approachable. Education on the following topics will be useful:

Warning signs of suicide:

* Preoccupation with death and dying

* Signs of depression

* Taking excessive risks

* Increased drug use

* The verbalizing of suicide threats

* The giving away of prized personal possessions

* The collection and discussion of information on suicide methods

* The expression of hopelessness, helplessness, and anger at oneself or the world

* Themes of death or depression evident in conversation, written expressions, reading selections, or artwork

* The scratching or marking of the body, or other self-destructive acts

* Acute personality changes, unusual withdrawal, aggressiveness, or moodiness

* Sudden dramatic decline or improvement in academic performance, chronic truancy or tardiness, or running away

* Physical symptoms such as eating disturbances, sleeplessness or excessive sleeping, chronic headaches or stomachaches, menstrual irregularities, apathetic appearance

Sudden changes in behavior that are significant, last for a long time, and are apparent in all or most areas of his or her life (pervasive) are more specific than presence of isolated signs. However, it should be noted that many completed suicides had only a few of the conditions listed above, and that all indications of suicidality need to be taken seriously in a one person to another person situation.

Signs of depression in teens:

* Sad, anxious or “empty” mood

* Declining school performance

* Loss of pleasure/interest in social and sports activities

* Sleeping too much or too little

* Changes in weight or appetite

Factors associated with repeated self harm:

* Previous self harm

* Personality disturbance

* Depression

* Alcohol or drug misuse

* Chronic psychosocial problems and behaviour disturbance

* Disturbed family relationships

* Alcohol dependence in the family

* Social isolation

* Poor school record

How to support a student with suicidal thoughts and a low self-esteem?

* Listen actively. Teach problem-solving skills

* Encourage positive thinking. Instead of saying that he cannot do something, he should say that he will try.

* Help the student write a list of his or her good qualities.

* Give the student opportunities for success. Give as much praise as possible

* Help the student set up a step-by-step plan to achieve his goals.

* Talk to the family so that they can understand how the student is feeling.

* He or she might benefit from assertiveness training

* Helping others may raise one’s self-esteem.

* Get the student involved in positive activities in school or in the community.

* If appropriate, involve the student’s religious community.

* Make up a contract with rewards for positive and new behaviors.

What can be done to help someone who may be suicidal?:

1. Take it seriously.

Myth: “The people who talk about it don’t do it.” Studies have found that more than 75% of all completed suicides did things in the few weeks or months prior to their deaths to indicate to others that they were in deep despair. Anyone expressing suicidal feelings needs immediate attention.

Myth: “Anyone who tries to kill himself has got to be crazy.” Perhaps 10% of all suicidal people are psychotic or have delusional beliefs about reality. Most suicidal people suffer from the recognized mental illness of depression; but many depressed people adequately manage their daily affairs. The absence of “craziness” does not mean the absence of suicide risk.

“Those problems weren’t enough to commit suicide over,” is often said by people who knew a completed suicide. You cannot assume that because you feel something is not worth being suicidal about, that the person you are with feels the same way. It is not how bad the problem is, but how badly it’s hurting the person who has it.

2. Remember: suicidal behavior is a cry for help.

Myth: “If someone is going to kill himself, nothing can stop him.” The fact that a person is still alive is sufficient proof that part of him wants to remain alive. The suicidal person is ambivalent – part of him wants to live and part of him wants not so much death as he wants the pain to end. It is the part that wants to live that tells another “I feel suicidal.” If a suicidal person turns to you it is likely that he believes that you are more caring, more informed about coping with misfortune, and more willing to protect his confidentiality. No matter how negative the manner and content of his talk, he is doing a positive thing and has a positive view of you.

3. Be willing to give and get help sooner rather than later.

Suicide prevention is not a last minute activity. Unfortunately, suicidal people are afraid that trying to get help may bring them more pain: being told they are stupid, foolish, sinful, or manipulative; rejection; punishment; suspension from school; written records of their condition; or involuntary commitment. You need to do everything you can to reduce pain, rather than increase or prolong it. Constructively involving yourself on the side of life as early as possible will reduce the risk of suicide.

4. Listen.

Give the person every opportunity to unburden his troubles and ventilate his feelings. You don’t need to say much and there are no magic words. If you are concerned, your voice and manner will show it. Give him relief from being alone with his pain; let him know you are glad he turned to you. At times everyone feels sad, hurt, or hopeless. You know what that’s like; share your feelings. Let the child know he or she is not alone. Avoid arguments and advice giving. If the child’s words or actions scare you, tell him or her. If you’re worried or don’t know what to do, say so.

5. ASK: “Are you having thoughts of suicide?”

Myth: “Talking about it may give someone the idea.” People already have the idea; suicide is constantly in the media. If you ask a despairing person this question you are doing a good thing for them: you are showing him that you care about him, that you take him seriously, and that you are willing to let him share his pain with you. You are giving him further opportunity to discharge pent up and painful feelings. If the person is having thoughts of suicide, find out how far along his ideation has progressed.

6. If the person is acutely suicidal, do not leave him alone.

If the means are present, try to get rid of them. Detoxify the school or home.

7. Urge professional help.

Persistence and patience may be needed to seek, engage and continue with as many options as possible. In any referral situation, let the person know you care and want to maintain contact.

8. No secrets.

It is the part of the person that is afraid of more pain that says “Don’t tell anyone.” It is the part that wants to stay alive that tells you about it. Respond to that part of the person and persistently seek out a mature and compassionate person with whom you can review the situation. Distributing the anxieties and responsibilities of suicide prevention makes it easier and much more effective.

Interventions with a suicidal student:

Schools should have a written protocol for dealing with a student who shows signs of suicidal or other dangerous behavior. The following steps may be effective in dealing with a student who expresses active suicidal intent.

1. Calm the immediate crisis situation. Do not leave the suicidal student alone even for a minute. Ask whether he or she is in possession of any potentially dangerous objects or medications. If the student has dangerous items on his person, be calm and try to verbally persuade the student to give them to you. Do not engage in a physical struggle to get the items. Call administration or the designated crisis team. Escort the student away from other students to a safe place where the crisis team members can talk to him. Be sure that there is access to a telephone.

2. The crisis individuals then interview the student and determine the potential risk for suicide.

a. If the student is holding on to dangerous items, it is the highest risk situation. Staff should call an ambulance, the police and the student’s parents. Staff should try to calm the student and ask for the dangerous items.

b. If the student has no dangerous objects, but appears to be an immediate suicide risk, it would be considered a high-risk situation. If the student is upset because of physical or sexual abuse, staff should notify the appropriate school personnel and contact the police. If there is no evidence of abuse or neglect, staff should contact parents and ask them to come in to pick up their child. Staff should inform them fully about the situation and strongly encourage them to take their child to a mental health professional for an evaluation. The team should give the parents a list of telephone numbers of crisis clinics. If the school is unable to contact parents, and if the police cannot intervene, designated staff should take the student to a nearby emergency room.

c. If the student has had suicidal thoughts but does not seem likely to hurt himself in the near future, the risk is more moderate. If abuse or neglect is involved, staff should proceed as in the high-risk process. If there is no evidence of abuse, the parents should still be called to come in. They should be encouraged to take their child for an immediate evaluation.

d. Follow-Up: It is important to document all actions taken. The crisis team may meet after the incident to go over the situation. Friends of the student should be given some limited information about what has transpired. Designated staff should follow up with the student and parents to determine whether the student is receiving appropriate mental health services. Follow-up is crucial, because most suicides occur within three months of the beginning of improvement in depressive symptoms, when the youth has the energy to carry out plans conceived earlier. Regularly scheduled supportive counseling should be provided to teach the youth coping mechanisms for managing stress accompanying a life crisis, as well as day-to-day stress.

Role of the teachers:

Teachers play an especially important part in prevention, because they spend so much time with their students. Along with holding parent-teacher meetings to discuss teenage suicide prevention, teachers can form referral networks with mental health professionals. They can increase student awareness by introducing the topic in health classes.

Some schools have automatic expulsion policies for students who engage in illegal or violent behavior. It is important to remember that teens who are violent or abuse drugs may be at increased risk for suicide. If someone is expelled, the school should attempt to help the parents arrange immediate and possibly intensive psychiatric and behavioral interventions.

Role of the peers:

Peers are crucial to suicide prevention. According to one survey, 93% of the students reported that they would turn to a friend before a teacher, parent or spiritual guide in a time of crisis. Peers can form student support groups and, once educated themselves, can train others to be peer counselors.

Adolescents often will try to support a suicidal friend by themselves. They may feel bound to secrecy, or feel that adults are not to be trusted, and this may delay needed treatment. Ideally, a teenage friend should listen to the suicidal youth in an empathic way, but then insist on getting the youth immediate adult and professional help.

Role of the parents:

Parents need to be as open and as attentive as possible to their adolescent children’s difficulties. The most effective suicide prevention technique parents can exercise is to maintain open lines of communication with their children. Sometimes teens hide their problems, not wanting to burden the people they love. It is extremely important to assure teens that they can share their troubles, and gain support in the process. Parents are encouraged to talk about suicide with their children, and to educate themselves by attending parent-teacher or parent-counselor education sessions and from nearby libraries or the internet. Once trained, parents can help to staff a crisis hotline in their community. Parents also need to be involved in the counseling process if a teen has suicidal tendencies. These activities may both alleviate parents’ fears of the unknown and assure teenagers that their parents care.

Postvention/crisis intervention:

The rationale for school-based postvention/crisis intervention is that a timely response to a suicide is likely to reduce subsequent morbidity and mortality in fellow students, including suicidality, the onset and exacerbation of psychiatric disorders, and other symptoms related to pathological bereavement.

The school should have plans in place to deal with a suicide or other major crisis in the school community. The administration or the designated individual should try to get as much information as soon as possible. He or she should meet with teachers and staff to inform them of the suicide. The teachers or other staff should inform each class of students. It is important that all of the students hear the same thing. After they have been informed, they should have the opportunity to talk about it. Those who wish should be excused to talk to crisis counselors. The school should have extra counselors available for students and staff who need to talk. Students who appear to be the most severely affected may need parental notification and outside mental health referrals. Rumor control is important. There should be a designated person to deal with the media. Refusing to talk to the media takes away the chance to influence what information will be in the news. One should remind the media reporters that sensational reporting has the potential for increasing a contagion effect. They should ask the media to be careful in how they report the incident. Media should avoid repeated or sensationalistic coverage. They should not provide enough details of the suicide method to create a “how to” description. They should try not to glorify the individual or present the suicidal behavior as a legitimate strategy for coping with difficult situations.

It is imperative for crisis interventions to be well planned and evaluated; otherwise, not only may they not help survivors, but they may potentially exacerbate problems through the induction of imitation.

CONCLUSION

Suicide attempts and completed suicides among adolescents are problems of increasing significance. School staff, parents, and health professionals should be sensitized about the risk factors and warning signs of suicide, and about the ways to deal with suicidal adolescents.

FURTHER READING

* Gould, M.S., Greenberg, T., Velting, D.M. & Shaffer, D. (2003) Youth suicide risk and preventive interventions: a review of the past 10 years. Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, 42, 4, 386-405.

* Hawton, K. & James, A. (2005) Suicide and deliberate self harm in young people. British Medical Journal, 330, 891-894.

* http://www.depts.washington.edu/hiprc/practices/topic/suicide

* http://www.baltimorepsych.com/suicide.htm

* http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

Dr. Shahul Ameen, M.D., is a psychiatrist based in Ranchi, India. He edits http://www.psyplexus.com/ (a portal for mental health professionals) and http://www.mind.in/ (a portal on mental health for the consumers).

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dr._Shahul_Ameen,_M.D.

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Various suicide prevention strategies have been used:

• Selection and training of volunteer citizen groups offering confidential referral services.
• Promoting mental resilience through optimism and connectedness.
• Education about suicide, including risk factors, warning signs and the availability of help.
• Increasing the proficiency of health and welfare services at responding to people in need. This includes better training for health professionals and employing crisis counseling organizations.
• Reducing domestic violence and substance abuse are long-term strategies to reduce many mental health problems.
• Reducing access to convenient means of suicide (e.g. toxic substances, handguns).
• Reducing the quantity of dosages supplied in packages of non-prescription medicines e.g. aspirin.
• Interventions targeted at high-risk groups.
• Research. (see below)

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Over one million people commit suicide every year, making it the tenth-leading cause of death worldwide. It is a leading cause of death among teenagers and adults under 35. There are an estimated 10 to 20 million non-fatal attempted suicides every year worldwide.

Views on suicide have been influenced by broader cultural views on existential themes such as religion, honor, and the meaning of life. The Abrahamic religions consider suicide an offense towards God due to religious belief in the sanctity of life. In the West it was often regarded as a serious crime. Conversely, during the samurai era in Japan, seppuku was respected as a means of atonement for failure or as a form of protest. In the 20th century, suicide in the form of self-immolation has been used as a form of protest, and in the form of kamikaze and suicide bombing as a military or terrorist tactic. Sati is a Hindu funeral practice in which the widow would immolate herself on her husband’s funeral pyre, either willingly, or under pressure from the family and in-laws.

Medically assisted suicide (euthanasia, or the right to die) is currently a controversial ethical issue involving people who are terminally ill, in extreme pain, or have (perceived or construed) minimal quality of life through injury or illness. Self-sacrifice for others is not usually considered suicide, as the goal is not to kill oneself but to save another.

Source: Wikipedia

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